Afraid...

It is so easy to be afraid.

The story in a nutshell...
January 6 -- Barry falls on the ice at work and hurts his shoulder.
January and February -- The doctor sends him to physical therapy to see if it will mend on its own. He makes progress, but not enough. Doctor schedules an MRI.
March 8 -- Doctor says MRI confirms a full-thickness tear of the distal supraspinatus tendon. He will need surgery and is referred to an orthopedic surgeon.
March 9 -- Barry picks up the MRI films from the radiologist to give to the orthopedic surgeon, since that doc prefers to get the films and not a CD. Enclosed with them is the printed copy of the radiology report. Snoopy me, I dig it out and read it. I discover that there is also a partial tear of another tendon the doc said nothing about. I am also chagrined to see that the insurance doc also did not mention that the radiologist saw a "heterogeneous marrow lesion" in the upper arm bone that he thought needed to be checked out further with x-rays. He even said that a "marrow infiltrative neoplasm" could not be ruled out by what he could see on the MRI...
March 10 -- Barry gets a set of x-rays of his upper arm (at the radiology office recommended by our chiropractor), and he leaves the MRI films so the radiology doc there can compare the two and assess the problem. He brings the x-rays home on CD which my computer obligingly opens up for me... Yes, we can see what they are talking about--a wispy whiter area inside the upper bone just below the shoulder joint.
March 11 -- No news.

So today I was waiting.

Barry left for a very early meeting this morning. Coral stays home on Fridays, so she was still in bed. I was whisking around the house, full of anxious energy, wishing we would hear something before the weekend. The phone rang. The radiology office. They had sent the report to our chiropractor...

For some reason, the kitchen sink is one of my thinking places, and as I worked on the dishes, a familiar verse kept surfacing. I often repeat this verse, so the fact that I thought of it today was no surprise. "When I am afraid, I will trust in you." (Ps 56:3) A sort of statement. An act of the will. A decision today.

But then my conversation with God continued. Me talking, Him listening. I think He is used to that. I tend to talk more than I listen, not often a good thing! I told him how many things in my world scare me. I am afraid of pain, afraid of losing my loved ones, afraid for Coral's future, afraid of suffering... afraid of things that happen and things that might happen...

Quick as a flash, I stopped talking and listened, because He answered me! Not an answer I was searching for or thinking up. One that came and interrupted me. "Don't be afraid! I have overcome the world!" (I looked it up--Jn 16:33)

Worship is not just for Sunday mornings!

I called the chiropractor's office and wanted to make an appointment. He said he could talk to Barry over the phone. Over the PHONE?? So when Barry came home, he called. It is a benign tumor, not attached to anything, just there. And it appears to have been there for some time. We just have not had a reason to know about it.

"In this world you will have trouble.
But take heart!
I have overcome the world."
--John 16:33

PICTURE OF THE DAY -- 08/17/2008

Castor Oil & Toilet Paper

My childhood illnesses were not normal flu and ear infections and sniffles like those I helped my children through. We had things like jigger bites and mosquito bites, malaria, and dysentery. We took a very bitter little pill every night to help us keep from getting malaria, but occasionally we got it anyway. We knew people with huge tropical ulcers and tuberculosis. One of the ladies who lived nearby had lost most of her fingers and toes because of leprosy. When I was about 7, I caught hepatitis A (we called it "infectious hepatitis") from someone else who had it, and I was very very sick for about a month. Thinking back on it now from a mom's perspective, I can imagine how difficult that must have been for my mother, because at times she was not sure I would ever get better.

We did not know anything about Tylenol or decongestants or any of the other drugs we can get so easily now, but there was one thing we knew ALL about, and that was Castor Oil! My father was absolutely positive that, no matter what invisible bug was attacking his body, it could be flushed out once and for all with a good dose of Castor Oil!

And we children also learned first hand of its germ-flushing capabilities! How we hated the taste of that stuff, but Daddy had come up with a solution for how to get it down in one big gulp. He took a clear glass custard dish and filled it about 1/4 full with water in which he dissolved some baking soda (already sounds yummy, doesn't it!) Then he opened the Castor Oil and poured in a big dollop, right in the middle of that soda water. You could see the oily patch floating on the surface. ("That baking soda will cut the oil," he would assure us as we tried to put off that awful moment!) We knew just what to do, because we had watched him do it so many times. He would stand with the custard dish in one hand, poised for swallowing, and his left hand on his hip. Then back his head would go and he would gulp it down. No matter how much that soda water "cut the oil," there was no disguising that awful horrible taste! Then he would stand looking at us, and the first burp would come, and the taste with it....AGGGHHH! I can almost taste it now! "U-buh-buh-buh-buh!" he would shiver with that burp!
At the first sign of illness, we all took Castor Oil!

This wonderful treatment did not end with actually getting that oil down (and keeping it down)! About an hour later, we did not dare leave the house because of the extreme....ahem!...VERY extreme laxative effects of this wonder drug! It would be impossible to describe how very, very flushed those germs were...along with every other blessed thing that could possibly have been retained in our little intestines! We were clean as a whistle when this whole procedure was over!
Thus, you now know why the bottle of Castor Oil would indeed be only half the picture if "the roll" were not beside it!

(Now if you click on that picture and read the label on the bottle carefully, you will see that the manufacturers make the preposterous claim that this product is "Tasteless & Odorless!" The very fact that they felt it necessary to put that on the label tells you something! How many things do we buy that assure us, right on the label, that they are "tasteless and odorless?" 'Nuff said!)
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Don't bother with the vinegar!

Well, here is my update, just as promised!

Despite my attempts at a cure with apple cider vinegar, there was no stopping this bug's relentless march to its death. My immune system, while not as speedy as Coral's, nevertheless cleaned out my digestive system in the same tried-and-true method. Now I am in recovery mode. I have felt a bit feverish today with unusual aches and pains which are slowly improving.

We were not able to go to the prison services, unfortunately, but sometimes things are just simply out of our control.

(In defense of the vinegar, though, nothing works on my heartburn as well as apple cider vinegar. Sounds crazy and impossible, but it is true.)

Sickly-Ickly!

I stole that phrase from my sister because it fits perfectly! Last evening began a nasty episode for Coral with vomiting and diarrhea. Unless you have cared for a wheelchair-bound person who has uncontrolled vomiting and diarrhea, you probably only have a fuzzy picture of this. But trust me, if you could focus, it would not be pretty! It is amazing to me that her petite person could hold that much stuff, but it was clear her body did not want to keep it, so out it came. I can't let Coral lie down at times like this because of the danger of aspiration, so she sat in her chair and we all did the best we could. Dad pitched in like a trooper. In between bouts of retching and the resultant stuff out the other end (which nothing could contain), she gave me wan smiles and an occasional hug. I started giving her sips of Jello-water when it seemed there was nothing left to come up, and after awhile things calmed down.

Today she seems to be much better, but all of a sudden this morning she developed hives from her hands up to just above her elbows. The cause is a mystery to me -- leftover toxins? stress from dehydration? I know they were very uncomfortable for her, but as usual she did not complain, and in an hour or two they were gone again.

Now I have a queasy stomach and a headache...Will I succumb or will I conquer?? This is my first illness of the winter in spite of the awful bugs that have been circulating this year. Others in my situation have tried antacids at this stage of the game, all to no avail, I hear. So...I am taking another approach. I'm drinking apple cider vinegar diluted with water. This is an experiment but the only thing I can think of to try. I sure hope it works, because we are supposed to have two services in the prison tomorrow afternoon, and I don't want to let anyone down...

This sickly-ickly episode just reminds me again what wonderful bodies God has given us! Coral's immune system was galvanized into action and in 3 or 4 hours flat had totally cleaned her digestive system out and wiped out all those nasty little invaders. Yes, the process was unpleasant but it worked very well and very quickly, and what's more, her invisible soldier army is even stronger now to protect her from future attacks. Who but God could have thought of that and then designed a system that actually works? Of course, my little invisible army has wrinkles now but over the years it has built up muscles fighting infections she has never encountered. I will update you later and let you know if my vinegar ploy is one you might try some day!

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." --Psalms 139:14